CONNECTING IS NOT ENOUGH: Busting the Myth

This article originally appeared in The National Networker



It’s time to shatter a few illusions now. I’m sorry but networking groups do not produce referrals.

That may disappoint a few people who have spent a lot of time and money joining groups in the hope of generating new business. Hours spent at breakfast meetings, lunches and chatting over canapés when you could have been watching The Apprentice…..all wasted.

Before you panic and start cancelling all of your memberships, bear with me. I didn’t say it’s all a waste of time!

The myth is that new business comes directly from networking groups. Because of that myth, it is common practice to join a group, turn up for a while and then question why you have seen no results. The fact that many miss is that networking groups are merely the starting point; most of the business done and most of the relationships built are based on understanding developed outside of the meetings.

This fact stands whether you are looking at an online networking group or one where the members meet face to face. In both cases you still need to develop strong relationships with fellow members and that means spending some quality time with them.

I write and speak a lot about the importance of the depth of relationships developed through networking. Yes, it is important to build a wide and diverse network, but the real power comes from people who know, like and trust you. That’s when people will go out of their way to support you, when people will genuinely want to refer you, when people will seek out the appropriate opportunities.

Referrals and support come not from networking groups but from your network. They are two distinct entities. Your network comprises people you have relationships with, whether they are personal contacts or people you know through business. Your network includes your friends and family, social contacts, people you have met because your children go to the same school. It includes clients, suppliers, business associates and people you have met at networking groups.

Depending on the strength of your relationship, it is these people who want to support you the most, and networking groups are simply a way of feeding that network.

If you can focus on this, you can approach your membership of networking groups in a different way. Instead of looking for one off ‘hits’, people who you immediately see an opportunity to work with or sell to, find people who you’d like to get to know better. Spend time talking with them, meeting outside of the network and developing a real friendship. Through doing so, you will soon count them as a key part of your network, rather than simply being members of the same group.



For someone to refer you effectively, two key elements need to be in place. They need to both trust you enough to effectively put their reputation on the line every time they introduce you to one of their contacts, and they need to understand your business in enough depth to be able to recognise and convert opportunities to refer you.

The limitation with relying on networking groups, or online networks for that matter, is the number of people present. Unless you are in a small Mastermind-style group, there is little opportunity to have in-depth conversations with fellow members and get to know them better. This makes it very difficult to build anything other than a superficial relationship and unlikely that you will develop the levels of trust and understanding that enable mutual referrals and support.

It’s no surprise, therefore, that people who focus their networking purely within the meetings struggle to achieve the potential from their membership. If you take a typical BNI-style meeting for example, if there are 40 members up to one hour of a meeting will typically be taken up with presentations. There are opportunities for brief conversations before and over breakfast.

Yet there are always members who leave the meeting as soon as the formal section has finished. Typically, they then won’t be seen again until the following week.

It’s not much different at larger and less frequent events such as Chambers of Commerce. Many people spend time looking to meet as many new people as possible, collecting business cards. Conversations are fleeting, handshakes rushed and elevator pitches exchanged. They then move onto their next contact.

The only way those connections can work is if you develop them over time. That means taking time out of meetings to have better conversations. I often use that time initially just to get to know each other socially. After all, you want people you like and have something in common with in your network. Over time you can then find out more about each other’s business, the challenges you face and the introductions you seek.

Networking groups often impress on their members the need to have regular 1-2-1 meetings with each other away from their events. It’s not enough just to meet once and tick that person off your list, remember that you are looking to develop a relationship and that means regular conversations and staying in touch. It doesn’t just have to be two of you, meet in small groups socially as well.

Twitter and LinkedIn users are now holding regular ‘Meet Ups’ (or ‘Tweetups for Twitter fans!) so that they can meet face to face. In the UK, Ecademy have been doing this for years.

You will struggle to achieve anything near the potential from your networking if you focus your efforts purely on the events or forums provided by the organisation. Identify people who can justify a place within your network and build the relationship with them.

Networking groups don’t provide referrals. They can, however, introduce you to the people who, over time, will.

Final copies of '...and Death Came Third!' available for FREE with 'Networking in Ninety Minutes

We have just found a box of the previously sold out '...and Death Came Third!'. These are available for the cover price of £14.95 or for free if you purchase the 'Networking in Ninety Minutes' audio programme.

You can purchase the programme here. Please send an email following your purchase with 'Book Offer' in the subject line to harvey@lopata.co.uk, including your address if you have bought the audio programme as an mp3 download.

This offer is only available while stocks last and with full price purchases of Networking in Ninety Minutes.

Networking in Ninety Minutes

If you're still struggling to put together the right networking strategy for your business or understand how to maximise the number of referrals you get from your customers, I might now have the solution for you!

I have recorded a double CD set, Networking in Ninety Minutes. The first CD, 'How to Grow Your Business by Increasing Your Referrals' looks at how to implement a referrals strategy to maximise the new leads generated by clients, friends and business associates.

The second CD, 'Networking with FOCUS. How to Increase the Return on Your Networking Investment' explores the best approach to selecting, joining and getting results from networking organisations, online and off.

"Andy Lopata has consistently produced networking material that is of remarkable value and insight; 'Networking in 90 Minutes' is no exception. With success strategies that are straightforward and simple, yet powerfully cutting edge, this CD set belongs in the hands of anyone and everyone wishing to achieve optimum results from their networking efforts."
Ivan Misner, NY Times Bestselling author and Founder of BNI

"This CD pack is the perfect point to start to put a serious strategy into place, and is an essential investment for any serious business. So, the question is not why or when you should start working on this. The question is, what are you waiting for?"
Ignacio Hernandez, Managing Director EMEA, Currencies Direct Limited

"These CDs provide a great insight into how to focus your networking activities to maximise your return on investment and also claw back some work and social time by targeting the best events and maximising the activities related to them."
Richard Alvin, Managing Editor, Business Matters magazine

Click here to read more and order.

Networking Strategy Seminar - Harpenden, Herts 16th September 2008

Develop a strategy to get RESULTS from your networking, no matter where or when you choose to do so.

I will be running a half day networking strategy seminar on 16th September 2008 at the Harpenden House Hotel in Hertfordshire.

Do you want to:



- Achieve a tangible and substantial return on your investment in networking?

- Know which networking events and networking groups will be right for your business and know how to use your time more effectively?

- Substantially increase the benefits you get from networking and know how to keep on raising the bar?

- Get your message across in a way that your network understand how they can help you and take the steps to do so?



In this seminar, I will introduce you to a range of steps you can take to develop a successful networking strategy and communicate your needs to that network. I will help you understand how to:



- Distinguish between different networking groups, knowing which one is right for you

- Plan your networking to achieve considerable, and measurable, results

- Communicate your needs in a way that gets results

Full details are available here, where you can also book your slot.

See you there!

yourBusinessChannel interview - Getting a return on your busines networking investment

How much planning do you put into your business networking and how clearly do you know the return you are looking for?

If you have been reading this blog for a while, I hope the answer is positive. This excerpt from my recent interview for Your Business Channel may provide some food for thought:

Interview with Simply Marketing Jobs

I was recently interviewed by Simply Marketing Jobs . The interview can be found here.

Live in London - April 28th

I am speaking on 'The Noble Art of Networking' at The Swedish Chamber of Commerce UK in London on Monday April 28th. The event, at The Swedish Embassy, runs from 6.30pm until 9.30pm and I have a few invites for my network.

I have spoken for the Swedish Chamber before and the events they run are excellent. It is a very warm and friendly crowd and there are some very good people to connect with there.

If you would like to come along, please email me at andy@lopata.co.uk. I need to send names to the Chamber by next week, so please contact me by Tuesday 25th March.

Network to Get Work - How Easy is it to Sell at Networking Events?

As you may know, I had a full page article published in The Sun newspaper this week under the headline 'Network to Get Work'. The Sun asked me to provide tips on networking based on seven questions often asked by small businesses. If you didn't see the article, I'll reproduce the questions here over the next few weeks, together with my response.


How Easy is it to Sell at Networking Events?

Going to a networking event does not provide the easiest opportunity to sell. There are few quicker ways to repel other people than going up to them and pitching. If you think about it, at most events you’re wasting your time trying to sell, as very few people attend looking to buy anything. Why would you try to sell to someone who’s not looking to buy?

That shouldn’t discourage you, however. You can certainly increase your sales through networking, even if you don’t sell direct at the event. Through networking you can find a lot of people who can spread the word about your business and introduce you to new customers. Many organisations, such as local Chambers of Commerce, put on large-scale local events monthly that will help you to raise your profile in the area and get more people talking about you. People have to know that you are there.

Focus on speaking with people who you get on with and where you find conversation easy. As one person once said to me, “pursue the relationship, not the sale”. Do that and you’ll find yourself developing a team of ‘champions’, people willing to tell everyone else about you and point new business in your direction.

The beauty of this approach is that, if your champions then need your services themselves, they’ll then come to you out of their own choice. In the meantime, they’ve been referring you left, right and centre. Far more valuable, wouldn’t you agree?

A Starter's Guide to Business Networking

It's been a busy start to the year and as a result I've been neglecting my blog, for which I apologise. I will be looking to remedy that over the coming months and sharing with you a range of thoughts, tips and articles to help you network.

To start off with, I have just written the following tips for a marketing forum and would like to share it with you. It reiterates some points I've made in the past... but it never hurts to re-emphasise how important it is to have a strategic approach to your networking.

If there are particular areas you would like me to focus on in this blog, please do let me know. Your feedback is valuable.

For those of you who have said that you would like to come and see me speak, we are just confirming a couple of dates for public events and I will post them up here as soon as I can.

Andy
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you are new to networking, there are so many networks you can choose from. It makes life very tough. Many people simply join the network they are invited to, without a clear expectation of what they want from it. Here are three tips to make life a bit easier:


1 - What do you want to achieve?
Different networks provide different things, and it is important to be aware of what you're looking for from your network. Generally speaking, you can classify business networks into one of three main areas, although there will be overlap:

Profile Building - do you want to raise your profile in your local area, or globally through an online network such as Ecademy?

Brain Building - are you looking for peer group support, local knowledge, enhanced skills or greater understanding of your industry?

Referral Building - is your aim to develop a network of people who will champion your business and bring leads to the table?

Once you know what you want to achieve, you can look at the different networks available and ask yourself, and them, how strong they are in each of these areas. Then set clear goals from your membership that you can measure to see if it's working for you.

Online or offline?
With the growth of online networks, many people now ask whether these replace offline. A lot depends on what you want to achieve but the bottom line is NO!

Whether you connect with people through a facilitated network or through your own endeavours, nothing can replace personal contact. If you are going to build strong relationships with people, it's much better if you've seen the whites of their eyes! Online networks bring you closer together, but you still need to meet up wherever possible.

Of course, you can learn from each other and build an initial relationship online, but if you want people who will truly go the extra mile for you, you need that personal contact.

3 - What do you need to put in?
Networking is a proactive activity. It doesn't help to join a network and sit back waiting for the results.

Once you have clear goals from your networking, ask yourself what you need to do to achieve those goals. From attending events and preparing, to meeting fellow members regularly and having a clear idea of how they can help you, the focus you have on what your commitment is will make a big difference to the results you get from your network.

Please don't sign on the dotted line, hand over your cheque and sit back waiting for the benefits to come flooding in. You will be very disappointed with the results if you do, and so will your network.

'tis the Season to be Merry

As we enter the last week before Christmas, you're possibly in the midst of event after event, from work Christmas parties, through awards dinners to catch up lunches with a host of clients.

Naturally the prime aim of these events is to have fun and let your hair down (for those of you lucky enough to remain sufficiently hirsute that is!). We can't ignore, however, the fact that you will be faced with a host of networking opportunities, both in terms of relationship building with colleagues, clients and suppliers but also the chance to meet new contacts.

If you get an invite to an annual dinner or awards event, how can you make the most of the opportunity?

One idea is to take a guest with you. Someone who is already well-connected in the local business community. As people tend to stick more closely to their own crowd at such events, if you attend with a 'connector', you will find that they will introduce you to a host of people you didn't previously know.

One client recently introduced his brother-in-law to one of his team who is based in the same area and who is responsible for business development. When the two met, they found that they both have very extensive networks locally and, between them, they know most people in the area. They now have plans to attend a range of networking events together, introducing each other to people in their network. What a great way to share their respective contacts.

So, when that invite next lands on your doorstep, ask yourself...who can I invite?

Over 4 Million Reasons Not to Ignore People at Networking Events

A recent survey by the Department of Business and Enterprise found that over 99% of the 4.5 million businesses in the UK are classified as 'small', in that they employ fewer that 50 people. In an economy where the 'corporate' business takes the spotlight in the media and in our minds, small businesses are the engine driving us forward.

Yet, still so many of us still avoid speaking to other small businesses when attending networking events. We are looking to sell our services to bigger businesses, because that is where we know we can win good contracts and secure our futures.

If 99% of businesses are small, who do you think is more likely to attend networking events? Trying to find a corporate decision-maker at your local business lunch is likely to be a futile exercise. Take a moment and look at the people around you. They may not be your customers, but who do they know and who do they service? In many cases, it is the exact people you are looking to meet.

On Friday I was invited to open Albans Office Space ,a new serviced office centre for small businesses in St.Albans. The people who attended the event were local small businesses, many of them currently working from home and prospective tenants of the new centre. It would be so easy for someone looking to work with corporates to dismiss the other attendees as irrelevant to their business.

On the contrary, as a result of conversations at the event, I have the chance of introductions to a number of media figures and to a prospective new corporate client. Contacts that would come from a new start-up business.

Networking is not about selling, it is about developing yourself and your business with the help of other people, and doing the same for them. Combining experience, expertise, ideas - and contacts - for the common good.

If over 99% of businesses in the UK are small, it would be an unwise person who ignored their help.

One Small Step....

It's amazing the difference a small step can make. Just doing one thing every day that you would not normally do can bring tremendous results. If you set goals from your networking, plan the results you want and then ask yourself what you need to do to achieve those goals, you are more likely to take those extra steps.

I recently ran a workshop for NatWest Bank Business Relationship Managers on developing a strategy for their networking. I asked the participants to set two types of goal:

Financial - how much new business were they looking to attribute to networking over the course of a year?

Intangible - What areas of self-development could networking help with? Many people network to benefit from peer group support, routes to suppliers, a better network of people to refer to clients, confidence, presentation skills and a host of other reasons.

One of the people on the course was Paul O'Sullivan, a Development Manager at Enfield Business Centre. As a result of the workshop,Paul set himself a target of increasing his network. He recently sent me this email:

Further to your Networking Strategy Workshop, one of my personal/intangible goals was to approach/talk to a person that I don't know everyday. As a result of this I introduced myself to a gentleman who I had seen in one of the interview rooms of the Enfield branch on the floor below the Business Centre, but whom I did not recognise.

He was the PMA(Personal Mortgage Advisor) for the branch and we had a quick chat. I told him that I had a customer who wanted to move quickly on 2 buy-to-let properties and could he help out. He was happy to do this and we arranged an appointment. Subsequently the 2 applications were processed for my customer. He had bought a acquaintance along with him who liked what he saw and said that he had 6 buy-to-lets that he would like to mortgage through ourselves. These were subsequently processed and are at NatWest Mortgage Services now.

Both customers are also well known and respected in the local Jewish Community and have said that they will have more contacts and business for us because of the prompt & efficient service provided by us.

An excellent return and possible future return from me going and introducing myself to someone I didn't know.

What is particularly striking about this story is that Paul worked in the same office, for the same company as the person he introduced himself to. They saw each other on a regular basis but had never met. That might seem quite strange initially, but then think about the number of people you see regularly but have never had reason to introduce yourself to.

What small step can you take every day that could have a tremendous impact on your business?

A Networking Man of Mystery

When someone asks me what I do at a networking event, I always respond "I network", "I'm a networker" or something similar. I do this because I want to intrigue people and get them to ask me what I mean, and listen to the answer. After all, when someone asks you what you do in that situation, it is no more than the networking equivalent of "Do you come here often?"!

Last night I was at a networking event. Over dinner one attendee, who had asked me earlier what I do, asked me how being a networker could be a business. This was exactly the reaction I look for, it had obviously been on her mind for some time and she really wanted to know the answer.

This led our group into a discussion about when to let people know what you do. If you tell people straight away, they will immediately decide how relevant you are to them and how much more they want to listen. Because they haven't bought into you yet. Intrigue people so that they really want to know and they'll listen far more carefully.

But to what extreme can you take this intrigue?

I had been in a meeting earlier in the day and was describing a contact from my network. As I described him I suddenly realised that I don't really know what he does. He has an excellent reputation as a successful businessman with great contacts and as someone really worth knowing. But I don't know what he does. I had enjoyed a 1-2-1 with him only a couple of months ago, but still I don't know what he does.

At my next meeting I asked my colleague, who also knows this person, what he thought he did. He has known him for four years...and he doesn't know! And at last night's event I saw someone else who shares this contact, and he doesn't really know!

The upshot is that I (and I'm probably not along in this) am very keen to get in touch with my contact to arrange another meeting as soon as possible and really try to understand his business and what opportunities he is looking for. I don't know if that is the outcome he is looking for, if so it's brilliant networking, or if he simply doesn't know how to communicate his business.

At what stage do you tell people what you do and how effectively do you communicate this? Do you trot out the standard 'elevator pitch' fare as soon as someone asks what you do? Do you make your answer relevant to the person asking or give everyone the same response?

Or do you make them wait for an answer, ensuring that they really want to know?

Networking is good for your health

On my way back from yet another networking event this evening, the excellent Web Wednesdays, I read an interesting piece in the London Lite newspaper:

DON'T BE SO SHY, IT COULD KILL YOU

Shy men who avoid contact with people are more likely to die of heart disease than their more sociable peers, a study claims.

The 30-year study of 2,100 men reveals that withdrawn introverts have a higher risk of death from heart attacks, strokes and other forms of cardiovascular disease than other men of similar age and social class.

Looking at the stress and strain on the faces of people standing on their own at networking events, compared to the relaxed, happy manner of others engaged in conversation, there are no real surprises in this survey.

So go on, relax and enjoy yourself at networking events. And whenever you feel pangs of panic when you need to approach someone new just remind yourself, you're doing it for your health!

It Takes Teamwork to Tango

I've just received a spanking new copy of Russ King's new book 'It Takes Teamwork to Tango' through the post. I was fortunate enough to read a review copy. Here's what I said after reading it:

As a reader of non-fiction for over twenty years, I approached 'Tango' with a sense of trepidation. I don't do novels! However, I thoroughly enjoyed it and, to be honest, didn't want it to end. After years of running and attending networking events, it was amusing to see them through the eyes of people new to the process. And I recognised so many of the traits of fellow networkers.

Anyone who has been through the process of leaving corporate life to set up on their own and trying to find their way around the sea of networks will enjoy this book.

I haven't yet found my true love through networking, but at least I now know I may be only three degrees of separation away!

If you enjoy networking, I really recommend this book.

Networking with FOCUS - Bringing it all Together

If you have been following this series of articles, you will have noticed a couple of key ideas cropping up again and again. Hopefully by now, you will have recognised the importance of having a strategy for your networking rather than leaving things to chance.

As we have discussed, while many people look down on ‘networking’ as a series of old boys clubs or small businesses desperately exchanging business cards, in reality individuals and businesses of all sizes need to network to succeed. And that is much easier with a clear vision of where you want to go and what you need to do to get there.

In addition, you may have noticed the regular use of the word ‘focus’ throughout the series. Unfortunately, most businesses lend very little focus to their networking and therefore experience unsatisfactory results. This isn’t because networking doesn’t work, it’s because of a lack of thought that has gone into it.

As discussed in previous articles, to get networking to work, you need to:

• Know what the Financial return from your networking should be
• Set out some Objectives across the board, not just looking at the financial benefits
• Know what Commitment you need to put into your networks to get the results you want, and how much you can manage
• Ensure that the people who want to help you can Understand what you are looking for
• Bring all of this together into a clear Strategy for your networking.

In short, add some FOCUS to your networking and watch your business or your career accelerate forwards.

Getting Emotional

After speaking at a recent event, one of the attendees was explaining how, in his view, despite the high intelligence and career achievements of many of the people present the majority of them had a low EQ, making it difficult for them to network effectively.

I had been acquainted with the idea of EQ instead of IQ, the power of emotional intelligence compared to what we traditionally classify as 'intellect', before. What I hadn't looked at before was its link to networking but surely there is a clear parallel.

When you look at the Wikepedia definition of EQ, as 'an ability, capacity, or skill to perceive, assess, and manage the emotions of one's self, of others, and of groups', the link becomes clearer. After all, doesn't one's ability to network depend on your interpersonal skills?

In her 'Brazen Careerist' blog, Penelope Trunk describes Emotional Intelligence as 'the one skill you need for three key areas of career growth'. Describing Emotional Intelligence as the way you differentiate yourself at work in the new millenium, Trunk refers to Drew Gilpin Faust, the first female president of Harvard. According to Trunk, Faust's key qualification for the job is her ability to communicate well with a wide range of people, a notable shift from qualification-focused appointees in the past.

Last night I attended a Women's Social Leadership Awards event run by Ogunte Tribal Network and hosted by BT's Women's Executive Network. One of the speakers, Sofia Bustamante, talked about the power of networking for her and how traditional hierachy was being erased. Sofia shared with the audience her dislike of CVs for people applying for jobs and how they didn't really address the individual's skills and abilities. For Sofia, emotional intelligence, the ability to connect with others, is far more importance than work references.

While I am sure we won't see a sudden shift to all appointments being made purely on the basis of interpersonal skills or CVs being thrown out of the window; what is becoming clear is that the ability to make connections, develop rapport with individuals and with groups and to build a network is becoming more vital for people who either want to develop careers or build their own business.

Formal qualifications and functional ability remain important and will continue to be a key factor in career development. Accelerating personal achievement, however, will depend increasingly on the ability to connect with others, which is helped by strong emotional intelligence.

Penelope Trunk reference's Dan Pink's work 'A Whole New Mind' in her blog. In his book, Pink predicts the workplace of the new millennium will be about how people make connections.

“Key abilities will not be high tech but high touch.”

Networking with FOCUS - Giving Your All

Having set clear objectives, the next task is to establish the best places to network. With so many opportunities available, you need a clear understanding about which meets your needs and to which you can give the necessary commitment.

With your objectives in mind, research the groups in the area you want to develop. Visit them and find out exactly what is expected from you should you join. Membership of a networking group does not guarantee results. Whether building relationships, regular attendance or planning for each meeting, there are key tasks you need to undertake for success.

Two of the most common traits of successful networkers are generosity and reliability.

Much is made of giving first and then receiving in turn. Funnily enough, it works! You may not receive back from the same source, but, if you establish the reputation as a generous person who connects others, people will want to help you.

If everyone turned up at networks looking just to take, who would be there to give anything to them?! It is important to commit to help the group and others. It can also be a great way to raise your profile.

Reliability is a key factor in building others’ confidence in you. You must do what you say you are going to do, follow up on the contacts you make and turn up when expected, ready for the meeting. Who would do business with, or refer, someone who has not previously been reliable?

Ensure that you can devote time and energy to whichever network you decide to join. And if you can’t, don’t expect positive results.

Next time … Helping Others to Help You

Networking with FOCUS - Beyond Money

Having discussed how important it is to have a clear vision of the financial return on your investment in networking, we need to turn our attention to the other ways networks can benefit both you and your business.

While new business is a key driver for many people joining groups, networkers report a range of rewards derived from their activities. Whether you are looking at personal development and support as an individual or staff development and new ideas for a business, it is important to have a clear range of objectives.

With more and more people leaving corporate life to work for themselves, networks can fill the void left after being surrounded by colleagues all day. It is only when you have left this environment that you can truly appreciate the value of having a group of people to share frustrations with, brainstorm problems and generate new ideas. The peer group support provided by many networking groups can prove invaluable.

Larger organisations should not dismiss this benefit and its relevance to their staff either. Giving your key employees a safe environment in which to develop their confidence, try new ideas, present to other businesses and be motivated by a support network can increase their productivity tremendously.

By having a clear focus on which of these intangible objectives will benefit your business, you can make a better decision on which networks to join, who needs to attend and what you need to put in to them in order to get the results you want.

Next time … Giving Your All.